Finding Mr. Right at Mr. Smith’s via Thread

April 1, 2010 at 7:00 am | Posted in Matchmaking, News, Thread Updates | Leave a comment
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Emboldened by the success of our first two parties (and because we like free drinks as much as you do) we’re throwing down again. We’re inviting our favorite Bay Area Thread.com users and encouraging them to bring their friends to our next mixer at Mr. Smiths on April 13.

Thread.com's first matchmakers and singles mixer at Mr. Smith's.

Thread.com's first matchmakers and singles mixer at Mr. Smith's.

No theme, holiday, or cause — just an excuse to get a bunch of matchmakers, singles, and interesting people together to make matches. To sweeten the deal, the first 150 people through the door get a free drink, and it’s half price drinks all night long.

After the event, log back onto Thread.com to tell us who you thought was cute, and we’ll tell you if they liked you back. If you didn’t like someone, we promise not to tell…

More than 300 people attended our first mixer, and Thread.com recorded it’s 2nd highest day of Shuffle use. I saw a few matches happen that night, and we heard stories of friends finding dates on Thread.com after the event.

RSVP early to get on the guest list because we’re closing the invite list when we reach capacity. We know — so much pressure! But if you can’t make it this time, we understand. We plan on throwing more of these events, so make sure you become our fan on Facebook or follow us on Twitter to stay in the loop and attend our next party.

Do you blog here often?

January 4, 2010 at 12:30 pm | Posted in News, Thread Updates | 1 Comment
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We’re looking for new bloggers to build an online community that promotes Thread and encourages others to give friend-of-friend dating a try. Share with Threaders your social networking dating successes and fails, and benefit from the tips and tricks that worked for others.  Tells us your story about meeting your significant other for the first time, or how you use Thread to meet people in new cities when traveling for work. Blog anonymously or bare it all in the name of shameless self promotion — you never know who’ll you’ll impress with your witty approaches or salacious tales. Read our blog (https://sofalabs.wordpress.com) and email us at threadstories(at)gmail.com to find out more about blogging for Thread.

How to put yourself “out there” in the new year

December 28, 2009 at 10:02 am | Posted in Dating Tips, Matchmaking, News, Thread Updates | Leave a comment
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Online dating coach Laurie Davis offers tips for putting yourself "out there" in the new year.

With the New Year just a few days away, ’tis the season for lofty goals and resolutions.

But before you set yourself up with unrealistic expectations for overhauling your love life or finding “the one,” try perfecting the basics of meeting people.

Laurie Davis, an online dating coach fluent in the language of digital flirting, recommends taking proactive steps to meeting someone new rather than sitting back and waiting for the right person to fall in your lap. And that starts with putting down the remote and putting yourself “out there.”

Davis suggests updating your online dating profile and keeping it fresh and active to stay at the top of the search results. And if you’re constantly on the go, take your profile with you by using mobile dating apps such as Skout, and attend as many singles events as your schedule and wallet will allow.

But our favorite suggestion of hers is to leverage your social network to meet new people:

Social Networking. Make sure that you are connected on FaceBook, LinkedIn, Twitter and the like.  You can use these sites to contact new matches and gain the interest of your friends’ single pals.  Thread even helps the process along!

This year resolve to recruit your friends to join Thread.com and ask them to introduce you to their single Facebook friends.

Source: Examiner.com

Found on Craigslist: Have you been naughty or nice?

December 23, 2009 at 8:45 am | Posted in Dating Stories, News, Online Dating | Leave a comment
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Proving 1) nothing is sacred anymore and 2) Christmas is getting way too commercialized if even horny douches are capitalizing on xmas to get laid, and 3) Santa is sexy, writers at Washington CityPaper created a compilation of the 10 worst/best Christmas-themed casual encounter messages found on D.C.’s Craigslist.

Brought to you via Washington CityPaper: (too good not to reblog in it’s original form)

TEN:

CL

Clarification: not actually a sex ad:

I am just looking for a woman that would be willing to give me a Christmas gift I have always wanted….her to kick me. 🙂 I’m not looking for anything sexual at all, so you do not have to worry about that. Just would like to find a woman that would like to have a guy she can kick whenever she likes. Hope to hear from you. Merry Christmas!

NINE:

CL2
For the girl with Santa issues:

It is that time of year again when santa gets VERY stressed out and he is looking for a good girl who would like to let him pay her a special visit (or a bad one who wants to get on the good list) and help santa out. Looking to come by and spread some christmas cheer. Santa has a wonderful candy can for you to suck on. And from there stuff your stocking and give you a very merry christmas! Send santa a letter and tell him what kind of girl you have been this year and what you want 🙂

EIGHT:

CL8

I have found the woman for you, good sir! It feels so good to play holiday matchmaker:

I’m looking for a man with a santa suit to satisfy a naughty Christmas fantasy.

You should be clean, drug and disease free, 30 – 45 years old.

please respond with a photo of your face and put the word “Santa” in the subject line.

SEVEN:

CL3

What woman could resist becoming this dude’s ornament?

I NEED SOMEONE TO DECORATE MY CHRISTMAS TREE AND RAISE MY SPIRITS BEFORE THE HOLIDAY! I FIND BEAUTY IN MANY SHAPES, SIZES, ETC, SO PLEASE DON’T BE SHY. PLEASE RESPOND WITH HOW YOU WOULD LIKE TO SPRUCEN UP MY TREE, PLEASE SEND A PIC. FYI I’M HOPING FOR COAL THIS YEAR SO THE NAUGHTIER THE BETTER;-)

I, too, am interested in how women intend to “sprucen up my tree” this holiday season. Do you think that’s German?

SIX:

CL9

Extra points for making a holiday pun out of your condom use:

Yes, I should put more into this ad, but the title is what I’m looking for. I get off on giving women something that their husbands or boyfriends SHOULD be able to, but can’t. While he’s plowing the snow, we can either stay inside and keep each other warm, or you can sneak out to do some “last minute Christmas shopping”, either way, I’ll give you a nice, big, wrapped present.

Read the original article and the rest of the top five at Washington CityPaper. If you find salacious Santa sex ads in your Craigslist hometown, add them to the comments.

Source: Washington CityPaper

Crowd sourcing your love life

December 22, 2009 at 8:30 am | Posted in Matchmaking, News, Social Media | 1 Comment
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Rather than randomly trawl the internet for Mr Right, Sarah Stokely plans to date 100 bachelors "recommended by actual humans". Photo: Simon O'Dwyer

Frustrating dating experiences often make people turn their love lives over to a matchmaker. But how bad would it have to be before you turn yours over to Twitter?

That’s what one single Australian gal is doing. Unable to find her perfect match on her own, Sarah Stokely’s letting her matchmakers do the grunt work for her — all 1,694 of them and counting.

Part social media experiment, part summer fling(s), the 36-year-old media consultant is counting on her Twitter followers to set her up on 100 blind dates and watch (or is it read?) her love life unfold online.

Stokely calls it ”crowd-sourcing for pleasure.”

By reaching far out into her social network, she’s hoping someone she knows can do a better job than online dating sites of finding her the man of her dreams. Or at least a decent dinner date.

Stokely is quoted in the The Sydney Morning Herald:

”I was hoping people who had been recommended by actual humans will be better than what has turned out for me under that online dating process,” she says. ”It’s nice not to be that passive person with their photo up on a website, hoping someone will talk to them. It’s actually going out there and saying, ‘Hey, I want this to happen and it will be fun’, and people are responding to that.”

But before you recommend she meet your second cousin who’s a huge surfing fan, not so fast: she won’t accept a date with just anyone (she’s not *that* desperate). Potential daters must nominate themselves or be recommended for a date by a friend and complete a questionnaire that will be scruntized by 100 random Twitter follower pundits. Hence, the matchmaking.

Stokely has had requests from friends for similar dating “crowdsourcing” websites.

A similar approach, albeit a much less public experience, would be to use Thread.com to get your friends to play matchmaker for you with people from their Facebook friends network.

Source: The Sydney Morning Herald

Couples edition of VH1 Tough Love coming soon

December 16, 2009 at 12:00 pm | Posted in Celebrity Relationships, Matchmaking, News | Leave a comment
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Tough Love matchmaker Steve Ward is on a mission to get the female population relationship ready, 10 women at a time.

His hit series is currently casting for season 3, but before Ward and his mom try to shake some common sense into the next batch of dating disasters, the matchmaking team is going to work some magic on five couples on the verge of tying the knot.

Here’s what they’re looking for, according to the casting call for Tough Love Couples on RealityWanted.com:

Do you wonder if your partner is really “The One”?
Are you ready for a ring, but your boyfriend won’t take that leap?
Has your relationship lost its spark and you’re not sure if you can get it back?
Is your relationship at the “make or break” point?

VH1 and Master Matchmakers Steve and JoAnn Ward are in search of unmarried COUPLES who have reached a crossroads in their relationship and are looking for help.

The couples will be put through the paces of a relationship boot camp, and at the end Ward will declare them either marriage material or relationship wrecks.

But will the couples take his advice?

While half of a matchmaker’s job is being a dating coach, I’d be a little skeptical about taking pre-marital counseling from the duo. Either way, it should make for interesting television.

Apply for the show at VH1.com

Source: Reuters

Is she flirting with you? Probably not, according to research

December 15, 2009 at 11:53 am | Posted in Dating Statistics, Dating Tips, News | Leave a comment
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The scene: Crunch Fitness, San Francisco. Panting Guy finishes his workout on a prime window treadmill –the one where the headphone jacks still work– sweat pouring way more profusely from his face than a 20 minute workout should produce. Anxious Cardio Girl approaches, “No, I got it,” she says smiling, and wipes away all traces of his biological material from the machine before he makes his half-assed attempt at cleaning.

He thinks, she totally wants me, and continues to track her every move at the gym

She thinks, Why is this guy staring at me? Make him stop!

But it’s no one’s fault — people often misinterpret friendliness for flirting, although comparatively speaking, the male brain does it more often.

Researchers tested 280 Indiana University male and female undergraduate students’ ability to pick up on social signals. They asked the students to categorizes pictures of women as friendly, sexually interested, sad or rejecting. Although you’d think men would be experts on female body language, on average men mistakenly identified 12 percent of the ‘friendly’ women as ‘sexually interested,’ while women misinterpreted only 8.7 percent of the photos.

But men fared even worse when they were shown pictures of women flirting, and incorrectly identified 37.8 percent of them as being friendly. Women fared only slightly better by mistaking only 31.9 percent of the flirting guys as friendly.

The reason? Call it body language illiteracy.

Previously, scientists often reasoned that young men tend to “over-sexualize their social environment,” but this study’s findings suggest that women are better at interpreting facial expressions and body language than their male counterparts.

For women, this could explain a lot of failed attempts, according to an article in the Daily Mail:

The researchers also found that women overestimate men’s ability to pick up on sexual signals. They argue that many females wrongly believe that the men are well aware of their attempts to woo, but are just not interested in responding.

“Failure to pursue could be an indicator of misperception but could easily be explained by noninterest the scientists write in the journal Psychological Science.

However, when intentions are on the other side of the spectrum and men think a woman’s friendliness is a come on, they’re likely to laugh about it with their friends:

In contrast, women are very aware that males get the wrong end of the stick when they are simply being friendly.

This is because, the researchers argue, men who misconstrue a friendly gesture as a come-on are more likely to follow through with inappropriate behaviour.

Such embarrassing encounters will lodge more keenly in a woman’s memory, and she will also be more likely to discuss it with her friends.

Ouch. So you’re damned if you do, but you could be missing out on something fun if you don’t.

Source: Indiana University via Daily Mail

How to tell when someone is lying in their online dating profile

December 11, 2009 at 9:27 am | Posted in Dating Statistics, Dating Tips, News, Online Dating | Leave a comment
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To any experienced online dater, this is hardly a revelation: people lie in their online dating profiles.

Last year a Jeffrey Hancock, a researcher from Cornell University, studied the profiles of 80 online daters in New York and compared them to their physical appearance. He found  that 81% of participants lied about at least one of the three things in their profile.

We already know that women often round down their weight and men commonly add inches to their height, but Hancock’s new study to be published in an unpcoming Journal of Communication issue uncovers how profiles reveal when someone is lying.

The trick?

It’s not so much as reading between the lines as it is looking for what’s missing from the page.

Hancock found that people lying about their weight avoided writing about food, while people lying about their salary avoided writing about money. On the whole, liars’ profiles tend to be shorter, their “about me” section brief, and make scant use of the pronouns “I” or “me.”

“This is called psychological distancing, where speakers distance themselves from the lie,” said Prof. Hancock in an article, “We see it in perjury cases, in political speech and in the lab where we’re getting students to lie to one another. They are aspects of speech that reflect deception in a way we can’t control – they’re very unconscious.”

But don’t overscrutinize the next time you troll on Match.com — Hancock says its extremely difficult for someone to identify these falsehoods before the fact.

And while these fibbers are definitely being deceptive, they’re not necessarily being malicious about it.

Hancock observes that liars are motivated to enhance their profile, but still be able to accurately portray themselves when meeting in person.

But that’s not the case for all online representations of you.

A study by researchers at the University of Texas at Austin found that Facebook and other social networking sites portray a fairly accurate representation of a person.

While the reason for this difference is unclear, one thing for certain is that it’s harder to inflate your profile when friends can write on your wall and tag unflattering pictures of you.

Source: The Globe and Mail

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Just when you thought the internet was a safe place to look for dates…

December 10, 2009 at 12:09 pm | Posted in Dating Tips, News | Leave a comment
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The internet is an increasingly common resource to use when looking for love and advice, but unfortunately there are no guarantees on the quality of either that you might find.

FAILBlog posted a few dating #fails found online, proving once again that the internet is a scary, scary place.

The mating call of the out-of-touch dirty old man:

Really? You have no other dating criteria?

I wonder why she left…

Source: FAILBlog

New university course explains modern love

December 10, 2009 at 10:13 am | Posted in News | Leave a comment
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If you want to know why people have “friends with benefits” or why you date toxic bachelors, you could ask your mom, read a bunch of advice columns, or watch Sex and the City again. Or you could take a class on it.

Dr. Manfred van Dulmen, assistant professor at Kent State University, developed “Sex and Romance in the 21st Century,” a new course to help students understand why people enter into certain types of romantic relationships.

Consider it Psych 101, but for your sex life.

“In many universities there are courses on personal and interpersonal relationships that focus on marriage and cohabitation, but I wanted to develop a course that would cover broader relationships,” says Dr. van Dulmen.

Filling that void, the curriculum utilizes new research on dating and relationships, such as hooking up, mating selection, and rejection, and explores how early personal relationships–such as with parents–impact future romantic encounters.

Finally, an authoritative source, class, and textbook the explains every dating mistake I’ve ever made.

Although it’s not a required course (per my suggestion), the twice-weekly class is open to any Kent State student. And no, it’s not yet available online. But the need for adult continuing education in this field is huge.

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