Don’t say this to your single friends…

November 16, 2009 at 12:00 pm | Posted in Dating Tips | 1 Comment
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advice

We know you mean well, but dating advice is really best left to the professionals. credit: YourTango.com

The next time you’re listening to your friends bitch about how hard it is to find a guy or a girl, you may want to offer some words of advice, but don’t.

Chances are, they’ve heard it before and will totally misinterpret your well-intentioned observations as personal criticism, according to Karin Anderson, Ph.D., assistant professor of psychology at Concordia University Chicago. In an article for YourTango.com, Dr. Anderson lists the top offending suggestions that single people repeatedly hear that makes their skin crawl:

1) MAYBE YOU’RE NOT TRYING HARD ENOUGH.

2) WEAR MORE MAKEUP.

3) GET BACK OUT THERE!

4) YOU’RE TOO PICKY.

5) TONE IT DOWN A NOTCH.

You know you’re guilty of saying one or more of these things at one point or another, but the best thing to do in these situations is just listen.

“The message to singles tends to be that they’re doing something wrong, ‘You’re too this’ or ‘You’re not enough that.’ Being single is treated as this problem that needs to be solved,” says Anderson. “That’s really bogus. We should be telling single women, ‘You’re fine. There’s nothing wrong. Enjoy your life.'”

Well, that may or may not be true. If you want to see what stubborn dating behavior looks like unchecked, just watch reality dating repair show, Tough Love. But even if your friend really is too picky, too loud, or not sending the right signals, just offer a sympathetic ear and leave the advice giving to the professionals.

Source: YourTango.com

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  1. […] posted the top five dating suggestions that makes single people’s skin crawl then reached out to prolific Yelpers to find other annoying advice that me missed. Here’s 40 […]


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